Carly DW Bones

Sex Educator

I believe that inclusive, consent-based, pleasure-oriented sex education is something that everyone should have access to. I strive to create approachable teaching spaces where we can re-consider sex with both a sense of respect and a sense of fun and humor. My pedagogy is based on the idea that mindfully learning about sexuality is a powerful way to reclaim sex on your own terms, to feel safer in your explorations, and to add more joy and sensuality into living your life. As an educator, I frame sexuality as a form of creativity and expression through which we can experience more pleasure and intimacy. I am continually working to actively bring empathy, inclusion and anti-racism into my practice as a sex educator.

In our world we receive overwhelming and contradictory messages about sex — from pop culture, peers, family, media, our own cultural or religious upbringing, and more. Sex is a center of shame for many folks, which is manipulated by capitalism to sell us what we think we need to be “sexy”. So much of the messaging we relieve about sex is disconnected from spirituality, intimacy, pleasure, joy and autonomy. We receive toxic messaging over and over that only certain bodies are worthy of sexual pleasure and of being desired. As a sex educator, I work to change that.

I see consent- and pleasure-based sex education as a way to empower folks to reject these narratives and rewrite their own stories.

I am dedicated to creating brave spaces for learning about sexuality, without compromising the wellbeing and safety of the folks who are most vulnerable within a group. I know that sex is a very loaded subject for most people, and that I can’t assume anyone’s personal history and baggage when navigating this field. I teach through a trauma-informed and trauma-resilient lens, using somatic tools for re-centering and grounding as needed throughout my workshops. I strive to create sex education that is accessible and joyful, and that can meet people where they are at without shame.